5 For Hope

Dossier...DONE!

Hang on to your hats, because this is where (I think) things will start to get good.

You've all been so patient, humming along on this adoption roller coaster ride.  If you didn't notice, about a week ago we started up a very slight incline.  I'm sure some of you heard the clinking and sensed you were headed up rather than straight forward.

My husband sent a mailer to me last Friday containing the remaining paperwork necessary to complete our dossier and submit our paperwork.  I've been not-so-patiently waiting for the mailer to show up, knowing full well the estimate is two weeks from there to here.

When I went to bed last night, something said, "Tomorrow."

I wish that something would take to whispering lotto numbers, but I'll be satisfied with just this!

It.  Came.

WHOOOOOSH....

BIG downhill rush, stomach turning, and I had to sit down and catch  my breath!  Very roller coastery.

I had logged on and sent my husband an e-mail to tell him and the next second--BOOM!!!!--and the power went out.  Hmmm.  Interesting.

I took my husband's truck (which was not parked in the garage with the now un-electrified garage door) and headed to the places on my "here's where to go once you get that mailer" to-do list.

I took the papers and went to the post office to make copies.

Then, I went to the nearly grocery store.  Was I hungry?!  NO!  Inside the store is a branch of my bank AND a service desk where I could purchase a money order. 

I then went home, assembled the final stack of papers, wrote out checks, filled in the money order, completed the UPS mailing labels, stuffed the envelopes and headed to the UPS counter.

I UPS'd my dossier and a few other things to the Assistant Stork in Virginia.  This husband and wife team will take my paperwork, by hand, to D.C. to have the Department of State sign off on it and then to the Ethiopian Embassy for them to do the same.  Then, they will use the pre-paid UPS envelope I included to send the entire thing to my adoption agency in Washington state.

I also UPS'd the photocopies and certified photocopies to our caseworker at our agency along with our dossier submission fee.  Once our paperwork arrives on her desk from Virginia, our caseworker can submit it for transfer to Ethiopia!

Phew.

I trust from now forward the updates will be a bit more frequent and tons more exciting.

One step closer to M3 and it feels AMAZING!

The paper chase is OVER!!!!

Hey, Mr. Postman...

I received an instant message from my husband today saying, "Our adoption paperwork is notarized and in the mail.  Love you!"

Love you too!

Once that paperwork arrives, we can finish and submit our dossier.

Hurry, mail!

Beat the Clock

I'm a worrier.

There.  I said it.

I'm also kind of obsessive compulsive with the tendency to count and check.  As a child, I used to become physically uncomfortable watching Mr. Rogers come into his house and attempt to change into his sweater and tie his tennies before the end of the opening theme song. 

What happened if Mr. Rogers didn't finish in time?!

I didn't know.  I didn't want to find out.  I had no concept of editing and do-overs in television.  I just knew the fabric of the universe may be rent in two if the unthinkable happened.

Needless to say, I rooted Mr. Rogers on each and every day and said a silent 'thank you' each day when he finished on time.

For the past week or two, I felt like Mr. Rogers would have surely felt if he knew that I, and the other overthinking kids like me, were counting on him to finish on time.  I have felt the weight of the world and the silent cheering from the stands as I tried to finish collecting and organizing our dossier paperwork so that I could submit it in time to perhaps beat the court closure for the rainy season which usually comes in early August.

We have had blips and outright obstacles crop up, but I kept moving.

Today, in the law library, I covered two, long library tables with my paperwork.  I had to keep the originals in order in my magic binder while removing the photocopies and certified photocopies from their page protectors.  They have to be in the order they are listed on the affidavit of dossier.  I needed to remove them from the binder so I could send them to our adoption agency caseworker so she can give the dossier a once over and be sure we're good to go.

Once we receive the green light from her, we can send the originals off to the Assistant Stork in Virginia.  This mom and pop business hand carries your dossier to the State Department and the Embassy to have it primped and processed.  Then, the dossier is shipped to the adoption agency and off to Ethiopia.

The to-do steps have dwindled, my friends.  And, even with the blips and boneheaded happenings of the past week, we may be able to squeeze ourselves through that window before court closure.  Pray we do.  It would be an amazing peace of mind to have going through the remainder of summer.

I'm packing up the originals (but not sealing the mailer, obviously!) over the weekend with all the other necessary items so it's seal and go when the green light comes. 

I will be sooooo relieved to be done chasing paper.  Seriously.

This week, especially today, has left me feeling very odd.  Have you ever slipped on the ice and hit the ground before you even realized you were falling.  You have to sit there for a full second or two for your brain to catch up with the fact that you're now on the ground.

For girls like me, who have five year plans for their five year plans and like to spend a great deal of time in denial, this week has thrown me for a loop.  It's taken me a little longer to pick myself up and continue on my way.

We have been marking time for so long with the impending deployment and in our adoption that I feel like a log jam has just cleared and now we're just rushing down the river.

There is a very real possibility that our dossier could reach Ethiopia in advance of the court's closure for the rainy season in August.  I never imagined that was even a possibility because of the USCIS wait I'd thought we would have.  I'm still discombobulated over receiving the approval.  It's amazingly amazing.  And, because I am the way I am, I'd already resigned myself to missing that closure so my brain is having a hard time accepting the fact that we can possibly do this.  This weekend will have much time devoted to dotting i's and crossing t's so that I can be on my way to the state capital on Wednesday. 

From my research, it sounds like if we beat the court closure and our file is reviewed, we could be given our fall court date prior to the court's closing.  In other words, we would know in August when our court date for October/November would be.

M1 was so excited tonight.  She said, "So we're finally close!?"  I explained to her the remaining steps to which she replied we weren't close enough, but we're closer than I thought we'd ever be at this point.  We are very blessed and very excited.  We are also very appreciative for those who are excited for us and sharing in our desire to have our girl home.

I can't believe I let my husband leave the country with the bunk bed situation unresolved.  He kept telling me, "We don't need to do the big stuff until it's closer."  Um.  Hon?  Yeah.  It's closer!  I'm sure Team M (M1 and M2 and Mommy) can put our heads together, choose the perfect bunk beds, and find a way to set the room up nicely.

July promises to be a big month!

Big News for Our 100th Post

Believe it or not, this is Post #100 at 5 for Hope.

Our big news?

Our approval form from USCIS was in our mailbox today when I arrived home from work.

I'm beyond shocked.

Not that we were approved, mind you, but that this form was in our mailbox as our field office is super busy and has "January 2009" in the time block regarding the applications on which they are currently working.

This is huge news because this is the LAST piece of paperwork our dossier needed.

The.  Last.  Piece.

I am  having my doctor re-complete the medical form the office messed up the first time they completed it and that should be done by next Tuesday.  Supposedly, our official referral will be here close to or right after the end of the month.

Wow!

I feel like we're actually moving along now!

Sometimes I Wish...

I understand that people make mistakes.  We are all human.  It happens.

For some reason, though, I keep having instances where people's errors involve money and time.  Two things I never seem to have enough of when needed.

Aside from having my paychecks messed up such that I will receive both paychecks owed to me, but not until the 25th of this month, we had a blip today with our adoption money.

I sent our agency a check to pay off the fees between us and our referral.  Today, I heard from the agency that the check had been returned.  They had called their bank and been told that it appeared I had stopped payment on the check.

Um.  Not so much.

I made an immediate call to my credit union to find out how it was that a check written on our home equity line of credit would not have cleared.  After some investigation, the representative and I discovered that the teller who ordered my checks had not used the correct account number.  I had been sent checks for my savings account.  How is that even possible?  Quality control?  Anyone?  Anyone?  No?

Okay.  They told me they would print off starter checks for me that I could pick up tomorrow.  Later, I received instructions from the adoption agency on how the credit union can wire money.  I'm going to make them do that first thing in the morning.  I kind of think it's the least they can do.  Don't you think?

The good news?

I inquired about our referral timeline today and learned that barring any unforeseen circumstances, the "worst case scenario" for receiving our official referral looks like the end of June.  That's less than two weeks away!  Yea!

I will do better about posting.  It's been quite an emotionally draining couple of weeks.  I spent last week with my husband and he's 'shipping out' very soon.  Sigh.  It's going to be a long year.  I can't help but feel excited, however, because we have a wonderfully exciting year planned for our family's future.

Glad you're along for the ride!

Another Step

I wrote a check with a comma in it a moment ago!  Funny how adoption expenses remind us all those lessons we learned in elementary school math class on check writing.  I always remembered thinking, "Who in the WORLD writes a check with the word 'thousand' in it?!"  It's interesting to note that aside from my mortgage and the occasional school loan, I have not had to use that word on a check regularly!

With our homestudy approved, we owed our next set of fees (no biggie thanks to our home equity line of credit) and I will even be able to apply a chunk of change on the balance of the HELOC thanks to some fundraising funds we had not applied to anything else yet.  I'm managing all that and considering a yard/garage sale in the near future as some fellow adopting parents have had successful ventures.  Their profits had commas in them too!

Our paperwork arrived at USCIS on Friday, just as I'd thought they would.  I'm hopeful tomorrow we will receive some sort of notification from USCIS letting us know what's what.  Otherwise, I may e-mail the office to be sure that our paperwork has been properly joined in one file and to check on our status.  I'm especially interested to know if we were logged in when we filed our I-600a application or if our application date will be the date of completion of our paperwork (Friday).  Fingers crossed it is the I-600a filing date, but I'm not holding my breath.

We had some families in our program that I have been corresponding with via e-mail pass court this week!  Yea!  Their children should be home with them by the middle of next month.  How exciting!  It will be fun to travel vicariously through them and learn from their adventures.

Hang in there with us.  Our next step should be an official referral.  That is what I have been longing for since this process began!

Next Step

I finally tracked down the homestudy agency's director and was able to arrange the pick-up of my homestudy.  I'm leaving town in the morning and I wanted to have a UPS envelope on its way to the USCIS office today.

I did it!

I haven't a clue what to expect for wait times or anything.  I will investigate all that when I return from Utah.

I'm excited to feel back on track and to have another 'to-do' checked off our huge list.

Yea!!

Big Day!

Today I found out the gender of the baby my sister-in-law is carrying.  I'm not sure if it's public knowledge yet, though, so the secret is safe with me until I know otherwise from her. 

We also JUST received an e-mail from our wonderful caseworker at our adoption agency that our homestudy is approved.  FINALLY!  Woo Hoo and all that!

I also have my first dose of what it feels like to be so excited and not able to immediately share it with my husband.  He's sleeping at the moment.  He has training commencing in the wee hours of the morning so no phone calls for a couple days.  I plan to text him anyway just in case he checks his phone before he leaves for his training mission. 

I am over the MOON excited because this is a significant milestone.  It means we can complete our application file with USCIS.  It also means we can apply for adoption grants.  Additionally, it means our next step in this process is an official referral of our waiting little girl. 

Over.  The.  Moon!

Mother's Day

I know that M3 does not know that it is Mother's Day.

I know, too, that the woman who gave birth to M3 does not either.

It does not make it any less difficult for me tonight, as I finished tucking in two girls into their beds, to not wonder how much longer it will be before M3 can stop having motherless days.  It pains me greatly to think of this little soul wishing she once again had a mother's arms to nestle in, all safe and snug.  A mom to whisper secrets to, read books with and with whom she can trust her greatest dreams, fears and hopes.  Not that her caretakers do not love her, but a sharing with so many children cannot be the same as having a Mom.

Today I paused several times to think about the mother's heart who is missing M3.  I can't imagine.  I have never met M3 or held her or looked into her eyes.  The mother who gave birth to her did so many times and now she must take solace in the hope that somewhere on this planet there is a woman waiting to do those things for M3 again and forever.

That woman is me.

I'm ready.

I wish so much that she were here already.

I'm trying to be patient, but it is not a virtue of which I'm all that adept.

A Happy Mother's Day to all those who are mothers or who may be waiting on a very special little person to come into their lives.